Riot and Frolic

A Truly Glorious Food

October 18, 2011

I finally tried spaghetti squash. It's been highly touted. Something about nutrition and low-carb and healthy and blah blah blah. This crazy lady said it would be good, so naturally, I was skeptical. NOT! (I am once again in love with the awesomeness of this retort. Thanks, Borat.)

Anyhoo, spaghetti squash is a variety of squash that has flesh which looks like its namesake-noodle. Check it.

I mean, I love me some squash, but would this really be good? I kept imagining my ma's acorn squash (which she made with butter and brown sugar) with marinara sauce on top. Which brings me here…

Man, I love writing my posts at night. I make no sense at all.

Back to the squish. Yes, squish.

So. You get your hella-big, heavy squash at the market…

And you stab it a couple times with your chef's knife because you are not cutting that sucker open. (The stabbing will let the steam escape when you throw it in the oven. It's not just for anger management.) Then you put the whole monster in the oven for an hour at 400 degrees. Yep. Just throw it in there. It'll be okay.

Get your oven mitts on and take the big boy out of the oven. Now you can cut it open without a hacksaw. I used my trusty Wusthof to slice the squash in two.

Scoop out the seeds. Throw those away. Or not. You can roast them like pumpkin seeds, but that's not the goal for today, people.

Continue scooping out the insides for consumption purposes. One squash makes a whole lot of meals, so get your Tupperware ready. I roasted two squash and I've made eight adult and four toddler bowlfuls so far and still have some left.

I tried something simple and obvious for my first spaghetti squash meal and threw some garlic, marinara (jarred, for shame), parmesan, and mozzarella over the "noodles." I was still apprehensive while I was waiting for my dinner guests to arrive, so I scooped a way-too-hot forkful out of the pan to test it. DELICIOUS!

The squash doesn't taste too squashy and it has a little firmer texture than actual pasta, but it holds sauce really well and is a great vehicle (thanks, Frissy, good word) for getting some tomato-y, cheesy goodness into your mouth. Plus, it has some benefits to it. Like it's inherent vegetable-ness. And the fact that a cup of it has 42 calories. (A cup of pasta has 220 calories.)

V and Mae Cake were enthusiatic test tasters. V was slightly aware that I was trying to pull a fast one on her, but totally bought it in the end.

Try it and join the cult.

(Thanks, pretty Alyssa, for the name of this post!)
List of Last Week’s Labors of Love

October 17, 2011

– Mae Cake's first ponytail. Ahahahahaha! I was finally able to get a rubber band around her invisible hair. She was pleased.

– Our backseat is car seats, straight across. No room for adults. Chock full* of ladies. What is the world does "chock full" mean? Well. *- From "chock a block," a nautical term used when two blocks of tackle were stuck so hard together that they couldn't be tightened further. "Block of"? "Tackle"? Rope and pulley, ya landlubbers!

It's important to know the usual car-seating arrangement, so you understand part of today's list. V uses the middle car seat (the Cupholder One), because she can climb in the car herself, so I don't have to throw out my back putting Mae Cake in the b! (does anyone know what I edited there?) seat. Which brings us to…

– V Quote of the Week…

V: Why's Mae Cake in the Cupholder One?

Me: Daddy put her there.

V: Daddy's so silly…

He doesn't know what he's doing.

– V learns how to use the camera. Sort of.

I have a lot of pictures similar to these.

– Homemade playdough.

– roasted spaghetti squash, yams, garlic, potatoes…

yogurt pancakes…

apple frickin' pie…

and a couple roast chicken.

– did I mention the baguettes? Oh, yes. Baguettes.

– an afternoon outside.

– besides that full ride Harvard is giving V next year, I think MoMA will be calling to set up her new exhibition.

Little Mermaid, duh.

– my first two mile run after-baby. The men working on our neighborhood gas lines expressed a little concern when I returned home and collapsed in a heap in front of my house. I do mean "a little" because they returned to their coffee directly, after I threw my arm up in a weak imitation of a wave.

– marking my calendar for the opening of the TC Marathon registration. That's right, people. M-a-r-a-t-h-o-n. Or die trying.

– my second book club meeting in five months. Didn't read the book. Don't tell.

– activities with Zoo's godfamily. Football game (watching), eating, fire (outside, controlled), drinking, projector and screen (inside and outside).

– the return of girls' night! Highlights: eating low-carb spaghetti squash, drinking some really delicious high alcohol volume apple wine, choosing from three different chocolate treats, all while listening to 'NSYNC… The Christmas Album.
Play the Game

October 14, 2011

PLAY THE GAME!

Not that I haven't learned that lesson before, but each time I go to a ballroom dance competition, I'm reminded of the obvious fact that you should play the freakin' game.

[This is a ridiculous picture. Ballroom competitions don't look like this. This is what Hollywood wants them to look like. I digress…]

Let's say you're watching an NBA game. Go Celtics.

All the guys on the court are wearing their throwback jerseys and baggy shorts, but then some guy subs in for Kevin Garnett because Kev's on his fourth personal foul and the new dude is not wearing the throwback uniform, but has donned jeans and a t-shirt. Would you really think he's going to play? And if he did really play, wouldn't you be skeptical of his ability? Or his attitude towards the game?

Hmm…

If you're going to sign up for a ballroom dance competition, you are signing up to compete. You are asking to be jugded. That means several official people will rank you somewhere from first to last. For better or for worse, there's a whole lot of unofficial people who will judge you, also. But if you play the game and wear your uniform, you'll have a lot better chance at being taken seriously.

Tan

You might have the prettiest skin on the planet, but if you don't throw on some wicked tanning goo, you will look like death under competition lights. Plus, it makes you look more toned and who doesn't want that? Get thee to a spray-tanning booth, buy some Big Sexy spray-on stuff, or go all out and get this stuff (pictured at right; I couldn't love this formula more). But you must tan.

Hair

Whether it's a simple bun or an elaborate sculpture that took 100 bobby pins, do your hair. And hairspray it. A lot. You too, boys! Men, you need to use hairspray so you can avoid this…

Or anything like this.

Makeup

You should not feel normal heading out the door. From across the floor, I need to see eyebrows, eyes, cheeks, and lips. Wear the false eyelashes. Get a stupidly bright color of lipstick. You are a pretty, sexy clown.

Shoes

If you've spent enough money to get to a ballroom dance competition, you can afford the correct pair of shoes.

Body

Yep, put your best one on. Meaning, you had better be in great shape when you hit the floor. You signed up for four rounds of dances? Please don't be huffing and puffing after the second of twenty heats. My favorite quote from one of my favorite coaches/judges? "Two words: tread mill." Sucking wind after a couple dances is hard to disguise, so don't think you can fool anyone into thinking you could run a marathon after your Viennese Waltz. I know the "I'm dying, but am totally hiding it by doing this" face, which is strangely similar to Blue Steel.

Costume

I have all sorts of opinions on costumes, for both men and women. You can check out the links to get a little idea of what you should (or should not) wear on the dance floor.

Bonus Points

Nicely french-manicured nails of a decent length are so pretty and draw attention to your arms and hands and duh, fingers. If you don't often wear them painted or faked, fantastic nails also make you more aware of your fingers, so maybe you'll actually finish your lines like your teacher is always telling you.

A really great fitting dress or suit is icing on the cake. Notice I said "a really great fitting," not "the most expensive." Keep shopping or altering until someone says "wow." Then keep that ensemble forever. Make different colors or slight variations on it and then you'll have a "look," which is super cool.

Peace out, yo.
The Pinterest Project- Is It Real or a Toy?

October 13, 2011

I wasn't sure how to answer V's question for this week's Pinterest Project. We made Kool-Aid Play Dough from Meet the Dubiens. It wasn't real Play Doh, but it was playdough. And playdough is a toy, so… No? Yes?

In any case, it really is all I hoped it would be.

A) I had all the ingredients. (Why do I have Cream of Tartar? What the heck is it?)

B) It was cheap. Or free, in my mind, since I had all the ingredients.

C) It took ten minutes to make. While I was making it by myself (the ladies emphatically answered "no" when I asked if they wanted to help), they ate flour. Everyone was entertained for ten minutes.

D) It smells delicious.

E) It is slightly more squishy than actual Play Doh, so I liked it better than the real stuff.

F) The recipe makes a ton of dough.

Check out the link above for the recipe, but here's the ingredients. Highly non-toxic. Mae Cake enjoyed a bite or two. I mean, it really does smell good. I was finding it hard not to try a bite.

Mixing it all up was like a primer for making bread dough.

In the picture, Mae Cake is about to dip her finger into a little pile of flour. V taught her how to lick her finger first, then "dip it." I'm so proud.

Kneading the dough for consistency- fun for Mama before the ladies dive in.

V enjoyed making "imprints," and making and smushing the sea witch (Disney much?).

Mae Cake liked ripping off little chunks, giving them to me, and saying "Ku!" (her version of "thank you").

I liked putting pieces of it on my face and acting like I didn't know it was there. Hilarious!

V is a genius and knew every letter as I made it. So, basically she can spell her name and will be receiving a scholarship to Harvard next year.

We played with it for an hour. An hour! That's quality time, people.

Did you see the awesome-sized balls (leave it) that each girl got to play with (leave it)? That was just one batch! Me thinks I will be making this for a party and putting it out for everyone to play with and take home. And not a little lady party. Like my birthday party. Which now, apparently, I am throwing for myself. We'll also have fruit punch and party favors, so it'll be rad!

Unrelated to anything above: how excited am I to be updating my iPhone to iOS5? SUPER EXCITED! "Earl" is restoring his music and vids now, so in about ten minutes I get to play with the goods. Please, Naptime, extend yourself! (Leave it!)
All’s Fair in Love and Yarn

October 11, 2011

Remember this project I started?

We are having a fight. I think we will be getting divorced.

After finishing three squares, I realized I wouldn't have enough yarn to make the final project (a super-groovy convertible scarf/shrug). But I had finished three squares, so I couldn't just rip them out and try something new. Too big for coasters, too big to combine for a pidge (what's a pidge? hahaha, you'll have to ask), too small for a scarf, and who needs only one placemat? This is dumb.

I'm calling my lawyer now.

And I'm hooking up with a younger, better-looking project.

This project will be a nice fling. It's cheap and easy.
How to Boil Water and Other Skills

October 10, 2011

Yeah, I totally stole today's post title from one of my favo cookbooks, which is also a television show apparently (how would I know; I don't have a tv, let alone cable).

Like any Monday, I was going to post a recipe, but I've barely cooked this week. I definitely have not cooked anything interesting. Or ground-breaking. Or worthy of repeat even.

I did learn that cardamom is really expensive and that I would like to shoplift at the Stonewall Kitchen. They have this..

And isn't that enough reason to turn to a life of crime? I've done it for lesser reasons!

Anyway, I've been trying some new recipes and concoctions and that led me to thinking about cooking in general.

How did you learn to cook or bake? There's a bijillion books on the subjects, but I'm pretty sure I learned some basics from me ma and pa. Maybe a cooking show here or there. A couple talented friends, aunts, and uncles. I discovered my palate (sweet or spicy, not much in between) and embellished and explored. Now I can cook some stuff. Magic.

Do you have any specialty dishes? Some killer recipe that you always get asked for at your dinner parties or block party potlucks? Oh, Lord, do you throw dinner parties? You must be grown-up then.

I'd love to hear from y'all. I'm just curious. Like Alice.

Tell me a story!
List of Last Week’s Labors of Love

October 9, 2011

– a family outing to the Minneapolis Sculpture Garden. Now I'm all for art, but Spoonbridge and Cherry is the only thing in that garden, as far as I'm concerned. And not just for the obvious dessert implications. Or the fact that it's by a guy named Claes Oldenburg. Isn't he the bad guy from A Series of Unfortunate Events? I'm just not a huge fan of modern art. However, if there was a huge fan in the garden, that might be cool. (Hahaha, "huge fan"… "cool"… I don't know. Make it work.)

There was also a swarm of biting gnats that seemed intent on our family. Other people were spread out on picnic blankets without a care in the world while I was waving my arms like a lunatic and looking like Cousin It, hoping my hair would offer some shelter. It didn't.

– a walk through the Renaissance Festival with a nicey-nice lady. Mae Cake was chillin' with my sunglasses.

– art class. Mae Cake dropped a marker and it made this cool splot on the floor.

– a trip to the "rainbow park." I still don't get why V calls it that, but it IS a sweet playground/park.

– some suspiciously easy pancakes.

– a tough day that ended with me eating Ritz crackers with Nutella (straight from the jar)…

… staring at the boxes in the open cupboard (I really liked the graham cracker verbiage)…

… then drinking a glass of water while staring at the "chitchen," V and Mae Cake's awesome play kitchen. V has an interesting way of saying "kitchen." The wall behind the chitchen is equally interesting after a long day.

– my broski and his lovely new wifey are in town for their MN "wedding reception" (AKA- party for people who couldn't make it to CA for the real wedding). My parents hosted it at their house and did all the cooking and everything. It was a FUN party. So fun, in fact, that I took no pictures. After the party, a bunch of us went to the Dubliner to hear the incomparable Highland Paddy play some rousing Irish music. A bunch of noisy Polish ladies forced my broski on stage with the band to play a tune or two. My MA even came out for the festivities. A night for the books, to be sure.
What Not to Wear

October 7, 2011
You've tuned in for a long-awaited dance post. Not for these guys…

Let's say you are going to do some ballroom dancing in front of people. Like, perform. Maybe it's a showcase, or a demonstration at a mall, or a competition. Whatever the event is, I'd like you to keep this in mind…
- a strapless dress. They make me nervous. If you find a dress that you absolutely love that happens to be strapless, sew some nude elastic straps on it. This way, I will watch your lovely dancing and not be holding my breath and cringing the entire time you're on the floor.
- clear elastic straps on your dress. Notice I said to sew nude elastic straps on a dress, not clear elastic straps. They're shiny (not in a fun way) and distracting. They're clear, not invisible.
- bare legs. There are veeeeeeerrrrrrrry few ladies who can get away with non-fishnetted lower extremities. Buy your fishnets. Wear your fishnets. Be better looking.
- black shoes. Same goes for shoes with rhinestones on them, but to a lesser extent. Unless you have the best footwork on the planet, it is not great idea to draw attention to your feet. If you do have fantastic footwork, you are allowed to wear black shoes only if you wear black fishnets. And a black dress, but…
- a black dress. I loooooooove black dresses. How can you not? But it's easy to disappear into the background with a black dress on. If you choose to wear black, you must have a gimmick (like a fur cuff on your sleeve, perhaps) or a ton of bling.
- your hair undid. You got your pretty dress, your fancy shoes, false eyelashes on, but you have a ponytail in your hair? Go back to Go, do not collect $200.
- your makeup undoned. Yes, undoned. You got your pretty dress, your fancy shoes, your hair all did, and no makeup on? See above.
- a snap-crotch. Do I really need to explain? Sew it shut.
- no support system. I might have lost you on the double negetive there, but please make sure everything is… secure. In other words…
- an ensemble you have never danced in. Please try out your dress, fishnets, hair, and makeup in a dance situation before you perform. It is the worst to find out you A) step on your dress in Waltz B) need more bobbypins than you thought C) didn't cut the band off your fishnets and they make you look all lumpy or D) all the above. Or E) a million other unpleasant situations arise.
Boys, I left you out of this one because the fabulous Marsha Wiest-Hines talked about it here. But, make sure your pants fit (fit, in other words- are not tight) and wear black socks. Easy!
In other news, I've had the odd experience of sharing several people's wavelengths this week. This lady and I have been writing about cloth diapers. My long-time dance coach typed out a comment on Facebook that is the exact title for next week's dance post (which I had already written). As I was in the middle of writing this post, I read an article in our local dance mag by one of my fav dancing ladies that brings up similar ideas.
The Pinterest Project- Are You Chilly, Honey?

October 6, 2011

Remember how I'm letting V name these posts? Well, I am. She just says the funniest crap. Apparently, V thought Zoo was not warm enough the other day, hence her concernicus (Dane Cook? anyone?) question.

This week, I was inspired by this car seat blanket over at Running with Scissors. Besides having an awesome name for her blog, she can Sew (with a capital S) and takes great pictures of herself (the kind I would take of myself if I could hooks it up).

I often have this problem, where I want to keep the babe all wrapped up for a car trip, but I just tuck a blanket all around her and then it gets kicked off and I want her wrapped up, dagnabit! Enter Jessica from RWS and her car seat blanket.

But here's the thing. I didn't feel like pulling out the sewing machine aaaaand it's been unseasonably warm, so I made up a short cut. Score.

Grab your well-loved (AKA "dingy"*) car seat.

Grab one of the million baby blankets you have in your possession. Seriously, one of the million.

Now, I very precisely laid the blanket in the car seat and was painstakingly careful about cutting little slits where I wanted the holes for the straps. Read: I slashed up a piece of flannel.

I mean, she's going to sit on it. It doesn't need to be pretty.

Put it in the car seat and pull the straps through the appropriate holes.

Place cute widdle baby in and wrap her up! Wallah!**

Note the shocked expression on Zoo's face. "I'm so warm and comfortable. How could it be?"

*Did anyone read the word "dingy" up there as "ding-y" (which is actually spelled "dinghy" and refers to a small boat)? I totally did and I knew what I was trying to say. Words are weird.

**That word, for instance, does not exist in the sense of "look at the magic!" But it's funny when you use it incorrectly.

Hey Steve, we'll miss you.
Dirty Little Secret

October 5, 2011
Warning! This post talks extensively about #1 and #2. Pee and Poo. The Diaper Twins. Whatever. Consider yourself warned…

We use cloth diapers. The G and I had talked about it a little when I was first pregnant and I researched the idea a little on the interwebs. I found a brand that seemed easy ("seemed easy"-from the girl who had never changed a diaper before she had her own kid). I found a retailer in the cities and then I fetched them.

After tracking down the right kind of detergent, I washed and dried the buggers three times, folded them up and waited for someone to come around and pee on them.

Luckily, we had V soon after.

Here's our diaper station.

It's only gross if I actually think about it: a large can of sewage sitting in my kid's room.

If you're interested in doing cloth diapers, here's what we do:

I bought Bummis. I got a starter kit which had a couple "wraps" (the outside, Velcro-y thing), about 2 dozen "diapers" (the part that gets peed and poo'd on), and these nifty "liners" (more on these soon).
- The wraps look just like a disposeable diaper, except with real Velcro instead of that magic tape that's on disposeables. Well, and the wraps are cloth. Thickly woven, waterproof cloth.
- I'm 99% sure the diapers are called pre-fold. They are very thick and absorbent.
- The liners? Ooo, the liners. These are fancy. Apparently, back in the day, one would get a poo-y diaper and "shake it out" in the toilet. Let me tell you: shaking doesn't always work. It is often more labor intensive. Let's not think about it! When you have these liners, you make a little open-faced diaper sandwich when diapering your kid: wrap on the bottom, diaper in the middle, and liner on top. So when little Bratt-ski goes #2, you just take this dryer-sheet-looking-liner off and throw the whole thing in the toilet! No shaking! No close interaction with poo!
We also bought a big garbage can and a little garbage can, each with a liner and a lid (I found them at Target). The big one gets filled halfway with water and some OxyClean. That's where we throw the soiled diapers. The little one is just for dirty diaper wipes.

The diaper station is in Mae Cake's room right now, which is adjacent to the bathroom. It's great if a bathroom is close by, so you don't risk dropping "anything" when carrying a dirty liner to the potty.

On the minus side, the diaper station is in Mae Cake's room. Which means it's two flights of stairs from the laundry room. When the large garbage pail is full of loveliness, one of us pulls out the garbage pail liner (it's very sturdy) and carries some awesomeness down down down to the washing machine. Heavy. Stinky.

I won't go into how to use and launder the cloth diapers because A) they come with directions B) that's what the Googles are for and C) everyone does something a little different. I will say I use Charlie's Soap and love it. I've never had any problem with it, besides finding it (hint: check out Peapods if you're in the city, or order it online).

With three kids, I have never bought new diapers, just larger wraps as the girls got older. I probably spent $200 on the starter kit, extra wraps, and liners over the years. Liners are the only thing I buy regularly and the roll lasts forever.

At night, I put two diapers in the wrap, just to be safe. Then I laugh as Mae Cake tries to walk without looking like a cowboy. It doesn't work.

We didn't choose cloth diapers for any environmentally-friendly reason or for a financially-responsible reason, both of which are valid and normal. We just did it. It's not that much more work than disposable diapers, especially when we use the liners. We do use disposables when traveling and with our new babies (the cloth diaper just seems too huge for their little butts).

What do you think? Disposable or cloth? Any questions? I can go into more detail, but I'm not sure how much more I can discuss poo without losing the audience for today. Leave a comment; I'll add on there!

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