Riot and Frolic

Just Do It

April 25, 2012
Some of you laugh when you read my posts about running (I think this one did it for a couple people). That started me thinking about how I started running. And more so, on how I kept running.

Here's some interesting things to think about if you're starting, or have started (and you're kind of hating) running:
- figure out discomfort vs. pain. Running is hard. But is it discomfort or pain? "Pain is getting burned by a stove." (quote from Runner's World article, by Jennifer Burningham) You can handle a little discomfort, right?
  
  Scraping up my knee? Pain. 4 miles? Uncomfortable.
- organized runs are fun. New running gear is fun. Being part of the running club (all of the people who run) is fun.
  
  Finishing is fun
- if you're running outside, you're running outside. You're getting fresh air, some vitamin D, smelling the roses or lilacs or apple blossoms, and that is good for your soul.
  
  Even the freeway looks pretty
- your head tries to give out before your legs/lungs/heart. You're pushing the limits of what you thought you could do, and your brain does not like the change. But humans can run farther than most animals because of how we're built (you should really read this or this). Once you're going for a few seconds/blocks/miles more than you have before, it's a mental game way more than a physical game. If your legs aren't giving up, why is your head?
- you can eat more. Or lose weight. Whatever. Running is a great calorie-burner at about 100 calories per mile for a 150 pound person (you burn more calories if you weigh more, btw). Even if you walk an hour (hey, maybe you'll break into a jog for a block or two), you just burned off your mostly-healthy lunch! Score.
- after running for a couple miles, your brain shuts off. It's lovely. Someone asked me what I think about when I run. Answer: nothing. Blissful, awesome nothing. I look at people and my surroundings (there are some amazing houses around) and listen to my footfall and breathing and don't think.
- decompress after a long day at work. Start your morning off with an accomplishment. Get some time alone. Shake off your road rage. Whatever your excuse, it's a good reason to run.
- you feel powerful. I NEVER thought I'd be able to go over 3 miles a year ago, let alone go 12 miles and run the whole time. How awesome is it to conquer your own long-held belief? Effing awesome.
Go forth and conquer.

Thor said so
10 Kitchen Tips For The Cooking Impaired (Part 1)

April 24, 2012
I am not a great cook.

I burn bread, overcook fish/chicken/leftovers, don't like to measure ingredients, often don't read the entire recipe and wing the last 25%, make dishes that taste like… nothing, undercook pasta/rice/any other grain you can cook, and only make things I would like to eat (aka, it's sweet or spicy and often nothing in between).

But I cook nonetheless. A lot. Many days, I make breakfast, clean it up, make lunch, clean it up, make dinner, and finally… clean it up.

So taken with a grain of salt, here's 6 (yes, a completely random 6; the other 4 will be continued next week) of my 10 Kitchen Tips for the Cooking Impaired:
1. Use a larger cutting board. The bigger the better. Because this sucks. And yet I do it all the time.
2. Use a larger pan. When you're cooking meat, especially. Something about the heat circulating around the ingredients and not stewing in its own juices. This article puts it all nicely. How many times have I tried to smash 4 chicken breasts into my little saute pan and wondered why it took forever? A lot of times. Here is a better layout.
3. No-knead bread is my lifesaver. Need a sandwich? Need some french toast? Need some pizza? Need some kind of food in a hurry? This dumb bread, which takes no skill and about 3 minutes to start, is the best go-to ingredient I've found.
4. Parchment paper. Use it. Love it. Put in under anything you're going to bake: the bread mentioned above, cookies, pizza, cakes… and never wash your pans again. Okay. Maybe you'll have to wash them, but at least they won't look like this.
5. Sharpen your knives. It is a pain in the ass to cut with unsharp knives and most of the time, you won't realize why your chopping/mincing/dicing is so lame. This video will show you how to sharpen your own; hopefully you'll give them a tune-up after each use.
6. If you cook meat (which we do, a lot), you might have a little can or jar on your stove to pour the grease into. When you have this nasty grease can full of your bacon and hamburger fat, don't take it out to the garbage with your hands and arms full of your purse, workout clothes, dance shoes, and Goodwill donations while carrying your beloved Nokia 3320 cell phone in your mouth because you will drop that awesome stripey-cased phone into the jar o' goo and the T-Mobile guy will laugh at you when you bring it in to be fixed because cell phones can't handle that much bacon. Put it in a plastic bag, okay?
safety first
List of Last Week’s Labors of Love

April 23, 2012

– I'm the victim of a perp! Someone stole my camera (yeah, that new one ) and my gin. What?!… And LB's delicious whiskey, which she ironically had here for safe keeping. I'm fine (don't feel scared or violated or anything needing therapy). But I could use a good punching bag. I'm quite pissed. I'm trying to get over it by typing this here post.

– Mae Cake's 2nd birthday was a blast-y.

V and MC split a cupcake with candles in it every day for a week. We'd sing Happy Birthday, then the destruction would begin.

Let's re-enact the crime…

– we also had a swingin' party for her on Saturday. I'd post pictures of it, but somebody stole my camera.

– The G and I bought her this awesome tent, which about ten times bigger than I thought it would be. If she didn't like it, I was claiming it for myself.

(Buy your own here, Kids Enchanted Tree Play Tent. There's only one left.)

– there's curtains in the window and other door for this tent, which brought around the interesting fact that V can tie a knot.

She was opening the tent curtains one morning and said, "Momma, I know how to tie a knot."

And I, being the great mother I am, said, "You don't know how to tie a knot."

And V said, "Yes, I do. You just take this one go around this other one and stick it through here and then pull it."

And it's true. That's how you tie a knot.

– a pink cake, by request of the lady of honor.

– V gave me a present. I really couldn't ask for much more.

Rock on, tiny dancer

Victim of lust and victim of vampirism
How To Do A Box Step

April 21, 2012

How To Do A Box Step: As Shown By A 3 Year Old

First, you need a good teacher. Preferably one who's not afraid to roll up their sleeves (or pants, as the case may be) and get down to business.

Second, you need some Post-It notes. Duh.

Then you stand on the one marked "1".

Then, you go back (on your right foot, or "that one") to the "2".

Now you step to the side (onto the "3", with your left foot, otherwise known as "the other one").

And put your feet together.

Next, you step forward with your left foot (onto the "4").

Take a side step with your right foot onto the "1". Almost there!

Put your feet together and you're done!

You're done!

When you put it all together, it looks like this:

And of course, you need to bow. ("It's a curtsy, Mom. Boys bow.")

Since these pictures and videos were taken, she's also learned the progressive change steps and natural (right) turns. I'm not bragging, I'm merely telling you that 5 minutes of practice a day does wonders for everyone. Even those with the attention span of a 3 year old.

Now go practice for 5 minutes!
Mission: Slightly Possible

April 19, 2012
My mission, that I have forced myself to accept, is to finish all these projects. Before Christmas.
- Sew a button on my pants. Don't make fun of me. I'm starting small. But the button choices, gah! I could pick the quiet kid who would blend in with all the other buttons (bottom). Or the one who would play nice, but probably end up smoking in the bathroom (right). Or the pretty one who would give all the other buttons complexes (left).
Paralyzed by button anxiety
- A pair of Quick Change Trousers for Mae Cake, featuring scraps of missions already accomplished.
Mae loves the polka dots
- A wrap skirt for myself from an old school Simplicity pattern that I hope to make into a reversible wrap skirt WITH pockets.
This pattern is so pretty! AND it doesn't match ANYTHING I own.
- An apron of me and probably two or three other littler (more little?) ladies.
OK, I like polka dots, too

If these projects go anything like my "fun" project of switching out drawer pulls in the ladies' room, I will probably die from an exploding bobbin spool or something else ridiculous. (Yeah, those 4 drawer pulls took me an hour to put in, a pair of scissors, needlenose pliers, a huge wrench, a regular-sized wrench, and some mineral oil. What?!)

Jonah Hill. What? You know you love him.
been enjoying your Jamba Juice, then “WTF!” found out the nutrition facts?

April 18, 2012
Mmm, I do enjoy a Jamba Juice every once in a while. Orange Dream Machine is my fav. Oh my Lord, it tastes like an Orange Julius! But with vitamins!

Right?

Well, yes. But check it, the ye olde ODM (16 oz., yo) from JJ has:
- 350 calories
- 76 grams of carbs
- 71 grams of sugar
- 8 grams of protein
- 15% of your daily calcium
- 60% of your Vitamin C
You could eat 2 Big Macs from McDonald’s and get about the same amount of carbs (not that I recommend that).

The sugar? Same amount that’s in a Grande Peppermint White Chocolate Mocha from Starbucks. (The longer the name of the drink, the more calories, am I right? High five!) Also, the same amount as 17 teaspoons of sugar. [Retching noise.]

On the other hand, you could mix a Vi-Shape Nutritional Shake Mix packet with 16 oz. of orange juice and get this:
- 212 calories
- 37 grams of carbs (mostly from the notoriously high count in the juice)
- 30 grams of sugar (ditto the above note)
- 12 grams of protein
- 250% of your Vitamin C
- 30% of the daily recommended amount of 23 vitamins and minerals
Half the carbs and sugar, plus all them good things.

And get this, if you blend it (in a blender, duh) with a nuch of ice cubes, it tastes exactly the same!

What what! Exciting.

If you’re interested in trying this out, order here. I like the Balance Kit. It keeps my smoothie fix loaded for a month with one drink a day. (And it costs a hell of a lot less than a month of Jamba Juice [$116.70 + tax].)

BTW, Orange Julius (a 16 oz.) comes in a little under JJ’s radar at 230 calories, 62g carbs, 59g sugar, and 80% Vitamin C. But their website is spectacular.
Polish It Up

April 18, 2012
"Polish" as is…

Source

Not…

polishing wood (twss)

My bestie just bought a house and I'm giving her a little housewarming present.

Since we're both Polish, I went all traditional and baked her some salt-encrusted bread and prettied up a broom for her.

freshly painted broom and salty bread

Because tradition is classy. And cheap.

Besides representing all that is holy and Polish (and therefore, awesome), the gifts have meaning:

Salt- keeping life flavorful

Bread- that you never go hungry

Broom- to sweep away your troubles

Brooms have a whole bunch of freaky traditions and superstitions to go along with them, like:
- don't take it with you when you move
- don't sweep any thing out without FIRST sweeping something in (what?)
- don't sweep at night (well, obviously)
- also give an apron to a new bride to bring prosperity
The last one is actually how the dollar dance started. The newlywed lady would don an apron and
sweep everyone off the floor. Then, a guest would offer money to dance with her, which she would put in the pocket of her apron.

And then you'd break a plate and take a shot of vodka.

Or something.

Crazy Polish people.

Represent!

Polish actor Adam Fidusiewicz
Birthday, Cake

April 17, 2012

The regularly scheduled Foodilicious post (up next: Top 10 Kitchen Tips) is postponed until next week to bring you this important announcement:

Happy Birthday, Mae Cake!

1-05 Free

Showing her team colors

Disneyworld touring in a backpack

Food and Dad- best day ever

Likewise

Sleeping like a man

Business in the front, party all the time

Climbing!

Princess Aurora is having a fab birthday so far: wearing her princess dress (duh), eating waffles, swimming with America, eating mac 'n' cheese and ice cream outside! it's a picnic!, playing in her new "tree fort", swinging at the playground (higher! higher!), painting her finger nails, and watching Toy Story, and… eating… popcorn, this time.

Hope you have a great #2, crazyface.

Buzz Lightyear
List of Last Week’s Labors of Love

April 16, 2012

– iPhone app I'm super impressed with: Find My iPhone.

After shooting photos with Broken Spoke in the afternoon, I noticed that I couldn't find my phone anywhere. The G told me to use Apple's iCloud to, uh, find my iPhone. Using my laptop, I saw it was in Rice Park, so I jetted down to search the park in the rainy dark last night. Armed with The G's phone, I signed in to the Find My iPhone app and told my phone to send a signal. Out of the darkness, I heard a sonar-type beep and I walked right over to my poor little wet phone (which, laying face down, I would have never found).

Score!

They're a good-looking bunch

– I ordered some new diaper covers for the Zoo. Three years later, my first batch have become unwaterproof. Not really helpful. I decided to try out Thirsties brand diaper covers and they are bomb. Who-ah. Bright happy colors, lightweight, yet waterproof (duh, necessary), and one size will last until she's thirteen or something. Oh, but maybe she'll be potty-trained before that. Let's cross our fingers.

– Lululemon? *drool* Let's talk about how much I love their stuff. No, let's not. I'll just say I could buy their entire store of amazing workout clothes and be entirely happy with every single piece. Take for example, the headband I just bought.

I have never ever EVER had an elastic headband that would stay in my hair for more than an hour without slipping off my head. And that's if I was sitting absolutely still.

I ran 10.5 miles, climbed all over St. Paul taking pictures, held babies, cooked dinner, and other full contact sports without this headband budging an inch. NOT ONE INCH!

It's adjustable and the colors are great. V says I look like a princess in it. I recommend.

Yes. It's a $12 headband. Yes. I will buy 7 more.

– I had a Kate's Day O' Fun on Saturday, which included a stop at JUUT Salon in St. Paul (ask for Liza, she's aaaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmaaaaaaaaazzzzzzzzzing), a shop-through of the fabulous Hot Mama (which ironically doesn't sell maternity clothes anymore), a stop for coffee and adult conversation at Nina's Coffee Cafe, and picking up lots of dirt at ACE Hardware. It was such a great day!

I got a lot of help at the hardware store.

Inappropriate dirt shopping attire

Could our kitchen have more food in it right now? No, it couldn't.

This picture made me laugh all day…

Cup in identity crisis

– a new venture. A couple weeks ago, I told you about this product. Well, now I'm distributing it! I'm pretty sure it's not a scam. In any case, it's a great-tasting protein drink, and you just can't find those all the time.

What's new with you?

He will kick your butt while wearing an owl tee
Going Line Of Dance

April 15, 2012

You're a ballroom dancer. You go LOD.

Then go LOD all the way.

Line of Dance is the super-awesome t-shirt company started up by ballroom superstar Chris Lynam (um, he owns the #1 Arthur Murray Studio in the world).

If you friend LineOf Dance via the Facebooks, you can get witty ballroom dance-oriented status updates:

Dear Aerobics,
I don't have anything against you personally, but leave my grapevine out of your routines.
Respectfully,
Foxtrot

Dear #9,
Nothing personal, but we have no need for you.
Sincerely, Dance Teachers

If you follow LOD on the Twitters, you'll most likely get a personal shout-out on being their new BFF.

Always on the forefront of fun-ness, the Line of Dance gurus started a Photo A Day contest via Tumblr, which might have a pretty neat prize. Find out more here.

But best of all, they have dance shirts. Witty, bomb-looking t-shirts.

Here's my top 5 (and a half):

1. Back [and across in CBMP] in Black.

For the rocker in every Standard dancer?

2. I totally dig the color scheme on this one.

it's in dance code

3. Like they said, if you weren't born with rhythm, it's now available for purchase.

I got!

4. The anime vibe and little details are spot on with this shirt.

it's funny 'cause it's true!

5 & 5.5. These shirts pictured below aren't released yet, and I'm dying for the Flashdance cut of the pink one and the Footwork Police badge on the grey one.

It's only right that I own both

Even better, most of the shirts come in guys' AND ladies' cuts (t-shirts, v-necks, and tanks, oh my!).

Order your favorite today.

Despondent over lack of LOD clothing

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