Riot and Frolic

Happy Wednesday

August 7, 2013
It's Wednesday. Here's a couple things to smile about:

Mumford & Sons' "Hopeless Wanderer" video. If you don't know who Mumford & Sons are, well… let's say they're a popular folk band. Mandolins are involved. They look like they sound: classy hobos. If you didn't know it, for the first 1:00 you'd think you're watching the boys of the band playing music in a field.

Things start to get ridiculous shortly after the minute mark, when you see them walking down a dirt road carrying way too many instruments and pushing a piano.

And hey, Ed Helms and Jason Bateman. Wait… They aren't Mumford or son…

mumford? son? no.

And isn't that my comedic boyfriend, Jason Sudeikis?

yes, he must mustache you a question

And don't forget about Will Forte.

he's not goat boy

Parental warning: there is sexy banjo.

oh yeah

The fury of Ed.

not the mando!

Lost on references? Imagine Chevy Chase made a Paul Simon video. Oh… Yeah.

Priceless.

Jimmy Fallon, curator of musical gems from his guests, joined the Roots and Robin Thicke for this winner:

Things I love about this video:
1. Robin Thicke's outfit
2. how thoroughly everyone seems to be enjoying their roles
3. kazoo
4. shaky banana (we have one)
5. precise xylophone playing
6. Questlove's Carlton dance at 3:10
7. Jimmy Fallon
8. spoons
9. UKULELE
10. everything
Have a great week.

One year ago: Can, I Do It, in which V proves she's awesome.

Two years ago: LLLL, in which I watch my favorite movies.
Something Stinks In The Garden

August 6, 2013

You guys, I almost took a picture of poop today.

[Never mind that I often take pictures of poop because our smallest offspring is potty-training and it is that big of a deal.]

I mean, I almost took a picture of a poop of mysterious origin and then posted it, so you'd have to look at it also.

I'm sorry for almost taking a picture of poop and making you look at it.

We just harvested our beets and carrots and so there was a huge patch of freshly turned dirt that apparently looks like a DAMN LITTER BOX.

I messed up the feral-neighborhood-cat-restroom by doing a second planting. And putting cayenne pepper EVERYWHERE.

It's doubtful that my root vegetables will be anything but spicy.

I put so much on there.

Can you see it? I can see it. I can taste it through my eyeballs.

former stupid-cat toilet

actual peppers, from the plant I thought was dead

my flowers and my shoes match

And garlic. What do we know about garlic? I want to plant some of that stuff. And onions. Those things seem exciting. #howyouknowyoure30

That's for you, Dina. - Melanie

One year ago: LLLL, in which I had to take down the man picture.
5

August 5, 2013

Today is V's golden birthday (she is 5).

She is great.

Happy birthday, #1!

Two years ago: Headgear, in which I wear stuff on my head.
Ballroom Flow

August 2, 2013
DWTS and SYTYCD and all the soon-to-be ballroom reality shows are confusing people. Is Salsa a ballroom dance? What's with Quickstep? What the heck is Dancesport? Why can't I do Lindy Hop at a ballroom dance competition?

Well.

Here:

Okay, so ballroom dancing roughly means any dancing that a couple performs. My favorite definition, while vague: two people moving as one. The general public seems to agree with this version, but if you're talking to a ballroomer or signing up for a competition, you need to be more specific.

When thinking of ballroom dance competitions (what PBS aired as Championship Ballroom Dancing and America's Ballroom Challenge), most people are imagining Dancesport, which was a fancy name the World DanceSport Federation made up to make a run at being recognized as an Olympic sport (done) and eventually be an official event (never!).

Dancesport (AKA competitve ballroom dancing) is broken up into 2 main styles of International and American.

International:
- International, as the name would suggest, is danced internationally.
- International Ballroom (formerly known as Standard or Modern) is danced in hold 100% of the time [no underarm turns, no side-by-each, no shadow… CLOSED HOLD]
- Winning a world championship in an International style is very prestigious since it is from, literally, a worldwide delegation.
- Historically, International is the more strict style with well-defined technical rules and syllabi.
American:
- American style is a melting pot of street dances, desire for less formal and more socially applicable ballroom dancing, Broadway, and Arthur Murray.
- American Rhythm and Smooth are mainly danced in, get this, America, but are gainly popularity in Canada.
- American Smooth is a combination of International Ballroom and Latin and is the only style consisting of only 4 dances, so obviously it is the BEST STYLE.
While American and International dances have dance names in common (Waltz, Cha Cha, Viennese Waltz), they are similar, but NOT THE SAME. In Rumba, the tempo and the basic foot pattern are different from International to American, but the character remains the same (romantic, third date feel, still a bit of "the chase" intact). Yet International and American Waltz share the same tempo and foot patterns, but the American style opens into spins, tricks, and Broadway-esque steps.

[Here is where I was going to have videos comparing the basic steps of International and American Rumba and Waltz, but it's reeeeeeally hard to find a video of anyone doing decent American basics. So… video comparison coming soon.]

Catch Dances:

Partnered dances are numerable. In this really terrible flow chart I made, I included the ones I have encountered in the studio more than 3 times… ever. I'd be amiss in neglecting balboa, New Vogue (hello, Australia!), zydeco, bachata, cumbia, shag, old-time waltz, and lambada, but like most of the "catch dances", their popularity varies from region to region.

The Catch Dances are not specifically Dancesport and are included in competitions due their regional popularity. For example: the MN Star Ball (owned and organized by Costa Rican, Eliecer Ramirez and his lovely wife, Rebecca) has included Salsa, Merengue, and Bachata in their competition, while at the Colorado Star Ball, there's a couple hours of Country Western dances. In other words, competition organizers can include any dances they want, as long as they include the 19 American and International dances that make up Dancesport.

Catch Dances also have their own scene. Minneapolis has a huge circle of salsa dancers, some of whom are ballroom dancers also. Likewise, with Argentine Tango, West Coast Swing, Lindy, and the like. Each genre of partner dances has their own world and some of the worlds overlap. See here:

[Watch out, world, I just discovered "blank document" on my Mac. Graphs and charts shall abound!]

Does this clear things up slightly? I feel like I made it better… or worse. Do you have any questions? I alluded to a couple topics and didn't explain them, so if you're interested, leave me a comment or question below!

One year ago: The Return of the Running Mojo, in which I discover my body needs water.

Two years ago: It's So Fluffy I'm Going to Die, in which I make fluffy things
Knotty Baby…Sweater

August 1, 2013

I don't usually crochet in the summer and I've never made an article of clothing and I've never made anything for a baby.

Until now!

Check. Check. Check.

The process begins…

a flurry of excitement

This seems awfully relaxing. #WHEREARETHE CHILDREN

1-2 hours

A spiffy piece of work.

3-5 hours later

I used this pattern, but didn't crochet as many rows for the sleeves.

guess who picked the ribbon color

A close-up on the shell stitch. Sooooo fancy. (Not. Shells are super easy.)

too easy

Here's the back.

with a ukulele tuner nearby, just in case

In conclusion, I liked crocheting in the summer (as long as it's small projects with silky yarn). I liked making clothing (more useful than a doily, less seasonal than a scarf). I liked making a baby item (baby clothes are unintimidating and quick to complete, therefore awesome).

BEST CROCHET EVER. *drops mic*

One year ago: A Rant About Zucchini Bread, in which I climb on my kitchen table.

Two years ago: Arguing With My Brother-In-Law, in which I hold THERE'S NO BUTTERSCOTCH!
Short Hair, Don’t Care

July 31, 2013
I cut my hair and lost my mind. Was my hair keeping my brain in place?

Yes.

Seriously, I cut off a foot of my hair (I donated it, but damn, if that thing didn't look like a nasty old horse tail) and now have decidedly Short Hair (bobs do NOT count as short hair, btw). And since then my hair looks good no matter what I do with it. (False: I just don't care.)

This is Before.

This is After.

I wake up in the morning and with total bed head… walk out the door.

Today? Went to work with an off-center cockscomb thing going on.

It totally worked.

I have "always" had short hair until a couple years ago. In college, I cut it into a pixie (yes, I cut it myself) and kept it that way until about 5 years ago when The G and I started doing 9-Dance (both the American styles). Then it seemed easier to grow it out then keep it tidy AND short through a LOT of dancing.

Here's what I hated about long hair:
- it is EVERY WHERE. Pieces of it floating on your clothes, clogging the shower drain, getting in your mouth when you roll down your car window, haunting your neck on runs…
- you can't wear lip gloss. Because hair is a magnet to that stuff.
- what the hell do you do with it? I mean… What The Hell? I felt like I should be creative with it, because isn't that what you do with long hair? But I really dug braids (with made me feel like I should don a schoolgirl skirt and chew bubblegum) or a topknot (and those cause Breakage; see following)
- damage. I had to worry about my hair. That just seems stupid. I liked wrangling my hair into a high bun that wouldn't move for AT LEAST a day, but that meant I had an ever-growing halo of broken strands around my head.
- so many accoutrements are needed, and an emergency stash needs to be nearby. Bobby pins, rubber bands, headbands, etc.
- maintenance. Other people have fabulous long hair. I would see them and admire their tenacity. I just didn't have the interest in maintaining long tresses.
- having to plan hairstyles around dancing. If I wear a ponytail, I might take out someone's cornea; if I wear it down, my head will be trapped in dance frame when the guy closes his hand on my back.
- it's supposed to be pretty/feminine/sexy, but I always felt like I was wearing a wig. It just wasn't me.
Here's what's great about short hair:
- it looks great no matter what.
- I can wear lip gloss with abandon.
- ballroom hair takes 15 minutes and is STURDY. (I did so much research before doing the chop to make sure I wouldn't be a hot mess after 10 minutes.)
- sassy. Just so sassy. (Watch me toss my head around and not choke on my ponytail.)
- people randomly pet me.
- I've been told I look younger.
- I no longer hunt for insanely irritating, stray long hairs which stick to my clothes and tickle me.
- MY HAIR ISN'T EVER IN MY FACE.
Here's some falsehoods people will tell you:
- it's easier. False: hair is a pain in the ass, no matter what. It's just a different pain in the ass.
- it takes less time. False: putting my long hair in a bun or braid took very little time. Rubbing some pomade in my hair takes very little time, but if I want to look less punk, I use a blow dryer, curling iron, straightening iron, and like 4 other hair products. It's a wash really.
- it'll make you look like a boy. Really? REALLY? First of all, there's these things called boobs we have that make it rather obvious that you're not, but … just… No.
- it's just hair. Yes, it's just hair, but you will more shocked by your FACE. Somehow, even with my hair pulled back every day, I was still shocked to see what my face looked like behind that curtain.
I'm completely happy with my new look. Scared to do it? DO IT! Unless you don't want to. Then DON'T.

One year ago: LLLL, in which we don't get the cow car seat cover.

Two years ago: LLLL, in which a popsicle box gets the best of me.
The Garden of Good (and Barely Any Evil) : 2013 Part 2

July 30, 2013

Earlier this summer, I posted about my rather benign garden.

Look at the cute little seedlings.

Admire the darling lettuces.

It's so tidy and meager.

BOOM. (To be fair, the children I grew seperately and the grill is not a natural occurence.)

FOUR kinds of tomatoes, of which one variety has already ripened and been eaten.

Lettuce. Ah, shit. Lettuce. We had a pretty dismal spring and early summer here, so when I left for a couple days in mid-June, I didn't think twice about the garden. When we got back, I had lettuce bushes and was completely overwhelmed by the amount of salad that was going to have to be consumed, so the bushes grew into trees while I nibbled my lip and worried over the growing amounts of nutrients that needed to be ingested. I continued to distress that my crow's feet would surely be visible by the end of the month (due to the vegetable to relative age ratio) when The G and Mae Cake harvested the massive crop.

A) Earwigs, dude. *shiver* I am very glad the family entomologists (Mae Cake, while scared of inchworms, loves observing all crawly things). Apparently, one of the lettuce was a head lettuce, but the inside of it was rotten and was housing a very happy and large group of earwigs.

B) Lesson learned: take care of your f-ing garden, or the earwigs will get you. Your laziness will be punished by HORRIFYING BUGS.

C) Maybe 2 lettuce plants next year, eh?

Because

D) EARWIGS!

I might have some spacing issues also. Last year, the morning glories were a total bust, and the sugar snap peas weren't so hot either. This season, both of them were happy-go-lucky to climb up the stake pyramid. (I have yet to get any flowers from the morning glories, though. What's up with that?) I planted a tomato plant what I imagined to be a decent distance away, but if that isn't a teepee of crazy, tangled up, tomato-pea-flower-crazy, I don't know what is.

But hey, produce!

Carrots and beets: fun. Zucchini: why are your leaves so ouchy? Tomatoes: yes.

Gerbera daisies? Why, yes!

They're still blooming!

What'd you plant this year? What do you get overwhelmed by? Any tips?

Love me some Will Tippin

One year ago: Double Rainbow, in which I tempt you to watch the funniest video.

Two years ago: Spiderman and the Orchard, in which I name names.
List of Last Week’s Labors of Love

July 29, 2013

– read Pride and Prejudice. Accidentally. Explanation: I like reading while eating my breakfast. Much to the detriment of my brain cells, my table has been well-stocked with catalogs and magazines. But late last week, GOD FORBID!, I had run out of inane material and I shuffled over to the bookshelf and grabbed the pretty, hardcover, B&N Austen collection. Because it's pretty.

I read about a page and I WAS HOOKED! I finished it in 3 days. Suck it, Twilight.

– made my first pie crust from scratch. It didn't suck and it didn't cost me $5 and a bunch of packaging, so my wallet and THE WORLD win. So did my stomach. Yum.

– how great is Northeast?

it's soooooooo great

– did you know you can get in the Guthrie and just walk around? That place is super neat. (AND they're playing Pride and Prejudice right now. [No, this isn't a sponsored post.])

– these kids. They don't get more normal every day.

– thanks to David Chin for the hilarious and lovely photos.

– I've voted LITERALLY about 1000 times for this guy on So You Think You Can Dance.

Mostly because he's had to wear a shirt every single episode, but also because he's a great Latin dancer and a total sweetheart and I KNOW HIM. MINNESOTAN!

VOTE FOR ALAN!

How was your week? Enjoying the Minnesota… fall?

Two years ago: Dance Me to the End of Love, in which I give really good advice to people who are about to wed.
I’m Annoying

July 26, 2013
I was talking to a new student this weekend about how much he LOVES dancing and how he practices it allthetime.

Like, allthetime allthetime.

Like, at the bathroom sink, on the way into work from the parking garage, in the grocery store, while making dinner, reading to his kids, talking on the phone. Practicing foot patterns and footwork and listening to dance music as much as possible in his waking hours.

Allthetime so much that he feels like he should apologize to his family and friends.

"Sorry [for annoying you with my passion for life]."

Many years after learning my first box step, I still feel annoying in my love for dancing. I mean, really, nothing has changed since my beginner days:
- Dance music is about 90% of my playlists; I've just found less obvious Dance Music [see: anything but the Arthur Murray Orchestra]. 01 Oh My! (feat. B.o.B)
- I practice turning and wobble and sometimes fall down.
- I do my routines solo and get hopelessly discombobulated.
- I look in any available mirror to see if my "sexy moves" are indeed sexy. (They're not.)
- I feel completely intimidated by better dancers.
- I stretch and lament my lack of flexibility.
- I review lessons and do technique exercises and mess up my steps one million times a day.
And I do this so much that my little ladies think everyone does it. It's totally normal to read the ISTD manuals during lunch and go to a studio for 2 hours every day to dance and have all your living room furniture pushed into the corner so you can do a Rhythm round at 11pm when it's 90 degrees with 93% humidity and to have your Pandora station on Caro Emerald so you can find new, awesome ballroom music. Duh. Normal. Annoying.

What hobby do you annoy people with?

One year ago: WIP It Good, in which I start an afghan.

Two years ago: Wabi-Sabi, in which I take inventory of my house.
Punctuation

July 23, 2013

It's been awhile since I wrote, so I thought I'd ease back into things by posting this weird sign I made.

And I'm finally enjoying Austen. So there.

One year ago: LLLL, in which I ramble on… in a completely out-of-character fashion.

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